The good news is that I have another day off from work. The bad news is I have to take my DH to the Dr. For those of you that do not know, my DH has a brain tumor. It is a very stable brain tumor--not growing--but still a brain tumor. Tom's main problems are seizures and headaches. He has 3 different kinds of seizures and has many seizures a day. Therefore he cannot be left alone. This presents a big problem of trying to have a family member here 24/7. While my children have been absolutely wonderful by helping look after him, they are growing up and working and generally getting a life of their own. So ....I am stressing out about our future and who will be taking care of him.
Did I tell you I am stressed out? I am getting more gray hair by the day! STRESS!
Well, tom has been having horrible headaches daily. I freaked out thinking the Tumor was growing and called the Neurosurgeon and requested an MRI. Everything is stll stable--Thank you God!
So I ask how come he is deteriorating before my eyes? The Dr. thinks he is overmedicated. So, I will be asking the Dr. to reduce his meds.. She is not going to like it but I can see no other choice, Tom has no quality of life now. He is in bed 16-18 hours a day sleeping and trying to get rid of his headaches .
I try to get him out for dinner once or twice a week but it really isn't in our budget. So I worry about him and how I am going to take care of him in the future.
We actually toured an Adult daycare center last Friday. I left in tears. It was so horrible. I am not ready to have him in one of those facilities--don't think I would ever be able to do that to him. So that is not an option. Tom is on medicare but I carry the insurance and we need my income so I cannot quit my job to take care of him without major lifestyle changes. Push comes to shove, I may have to go that route.
No wonder I am gray! Right? Did I mention a little STRESS?
I am sure it will work out somehow. I hope. Please God! I am trying to get a business built up selling soaps, herbs, jellies and old fashioned plants I have propagated. I want to start attending the local Farmers markets next year-maybe this will be a way to stay home with him--never know!
So off to the Dr. we go!